I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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