i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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