I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
