Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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