pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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