I hate your face
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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