is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize