I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
pray to the hookup gods
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Randomize
