you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I didn't notice because vodka
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize
