Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
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