this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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