Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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