cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
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