Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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