Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
