I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I need to align my fucking chakras
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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