You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
True strength comes from lack of pants