And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
