:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Randomize
