Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Sorry about my life...
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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