You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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