is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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