let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
