I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize