But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
