Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize