You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
