im gay
i know
yea but for you.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
How external is "for external use only"?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
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