Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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