Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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