About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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