Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
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