I feel like I'm in dance class right now
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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