Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Randomize
