I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
When did angry sex become our thing?
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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