yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Randomize
