love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
