Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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