If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Randomize
