My sheets look like a crime scene.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Randomize