apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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