You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
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Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
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Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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