Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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