Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize
