I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
If its not for food we ain't going out.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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