is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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