i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
