You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
