i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
