Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
