Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
These tits shall not be calmed
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize
